Entitled; Neurotic
What on earth just happened?
You'd think guys would be best pleased with a girl not eager to tie them down. No hidden agendas.
How wrong could i be.
Seriously? What just happened? Seriously??
I'm not even gonna go there. It's a gorgeous day, the beach boys are playing and i have a heap of revision.
This one can sort itself out.
What on earth just happened?
You'd think guys would be best pleased with a girl not eager to tie them down. No hidden agendas.
How wrong could i be.
Seriously? What just happened? Seriously??
I'm not even gonna go there. It's a gorgeous day, the beach boys are playing and i have a heap of revision.
This one can sort itself out.
Well i'm having serious deja vu. However this time, it's not such a gorgeous day, the beach boys are not playing and i have work... all week, with this awful swine flu like cold (although i believe it to be more to do with the shots of sambuca last night than the current pandemic).
Although, this time i have a better idea of whats going on. And i understand. It's got too that inevitable point where the whole situation is questioned. It's too serious to be casual and not willing to be anymore than that. I just don't want to fall out. Or argue. Why does everything have to get so complicated?
Last night i drank doubles, did shots, and then proceeded to have a panic attack in the middle of the market square. It came out of nowhere. The only thing i could think of that may have triggered it was that i was worried about bumping into John and his new girlfriend laura (Don't ask) in stealth. I think R miss understood when i tried to explain in the car on the way home. I feel very much over John, so much so that it scares me how quickly i got passed it and i've judged myself harshly because of it. I was simply worried because i wasn't sure how to react if i were to bump into them, because i was obliterated... hence panic.
In other news; i've got a 2 month free trial with lovefilm.com so i intend to watch as many films as i can between working, recovering from this cold and just relaxing. I've exhausted myself and i think this had a lot to do with the attack i had yesterday. I haven't had one in years.
And i promise, whilst recovering and relaxing that i'll make an effort to contribute some much more interesting and intelligent postings to the blog. This by far is the most half hearted thing i've ever written on here. It could be because my eyes are burning and i'm getting snot all over the keyboard - so i'll leave it there.
xoxo
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