Saturday 4 July 2009

Should have touched wood...

Yesterday i finally went to pick up the money John owed me and all the post that had built up at the flat. It was not a pleasant experience. I wish that i never have to go back but i've still got furniture to pick up. It was so empty. I was shocked that i felt nothing. He was shakey. I can read John like a book and he was uncomfortable. He said because he hadn't seen me for so long, but i was sceptical.

He's taken the pictures down in the bedroom and bought new sheets. Which means he's fucking someone new. I told him he was a better liar when we were together. There is someone. And it's Laura.

He made a comment about how she always calls him squire and makes him wear a hat when he goes round. I laughed, which i don't believe was the response he was fishing for. And made a comment that suggested that, that was kind of pathetic.
Which she is.
Not because she's probably sleeping with my ex. But because she irritated me from the word go. She seems pretty cool from a distance but honestly, some of the stuff she comes out with. She used to make me cringe.

It's a weird mixture of feelings. It's also very hypocritical. I feel nothing for John apart from familiarity and even that is beginning to wane, it's not that he's changed overly, or at all for that matter. But i feel like the girl going out with him wasn't me, it's all very surreal. And I'M sleeping with someone else! But that was my HOME! She's floating around in her irritatingly child like manner! On My sofas! My coffee table! My Futon! My Mirrors! My cups and plates! I'm more angry that she's acquainted with the flat than sleeping with my ex. I loved my flat.

So anyway. Babyshower today followed by the Maltcross with Jamie, Ruth and Luke... and to her great disappointment NOT Glen.

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