This is life

I am exhausted. I don't just mean i'm tired, sleepy, lethargic... I mean EXHAUSTED.

There isn't an aspect of my life right now that isn't just exhausting.

Physically, emotionally, mentally...

I've barely had time to come to terms with my break up. They tell you to keep busy, take your mind off it but i'm starting to worry that not too far from now everythings going to come crashing down around me. I think i'm yet to grieve. I think i'm yet to really decide.

I've been too busy with hourly updates from Ruth concerning her break up (this is kind of harsh, i'm sure the calls are not that frequent, but they certainly feel it)

And then theres socialising and boys

And revision

And work and money

And the ridculous distance i have to travel to do any of these things.

And not to mention the change. I was one part of two halves for 5 years and now i'm... not even sure. How do i even feel about that?

I don't have time to consider how i really feel and what i really want. I need to pass this year.

I'm going to hide away until the 11th and pray it doesn't all catch up with me in the mean time.